Consistency

2588743427_b244cd865a_nI just attempted to Google the following:

“help with consistency”

My only results were sports commentators on the New York Jets and parenting blogs.  Apparently, Google doesn’t know everything.

Let me go back a little bit.  I had a small epiphany the other day: I am a project-driven person.  I sort of knew that already – I love organizational projects, creating to-do lists, performing in shows, and my occasional forays into producing projects.  But when that little nugget of truth popped into my thought the other day, I suddenly realized that the opposite appears to be true, too:

I am not very good at consistency.

This is why I can’t seem to blog steadily for more than a few months at a time.  This explains why I go stir-crazy with an 8-to-5 day job but can totally handle 8-to-1.  This is why I have so much difficulty exercising and eating healthily, except in two-month sprints for important deadlines like headshots or wedding day.

I don’t like this.  Not one bit.

This became particularly clear to me as I’ve been working 40+ hours for the last couple weeks, to help with a project at my day job.  Normally, I’m just there till lunch time and then I’m off to auditions/classes/rehearsals/work projects (big surprise).  Which is totally, utterly doable.  But it’s been over a year since I left my previous office job, and I hadn’t realized how much I’d moved past being able to stomach 8-to-5 or longer days in a row.

The most amazing thing to me is that the more time I spend sitting in front of a computer, killing time, the less enthusiasm I have for doing projects at all.  Least of all for consistently plugging away at things I’m passionate about, like writing or exercising or even pursuing my performing career.  I leave the office bloated from too much sugar, foggy-eyed with a screen headache, and overwhelmed with a desire to go home and sit in front of the TV without watching it.  (Maybe this is why America has a weight problem!)

Anyway, it was a shock to me that Google did not have helpful search results for people like me, who find project-based work satisfying and consistent monotony (you know I’m biased) deadly.  Am I really the only one who can’t focus on the same thing for long periods of time?  There must be a way to deal with this!  It’s also probable that there are better search terms, but I don’t know what they are.

If any of you have dealt with this and have strategies, PLEASE help me out.  You can be more omniscient than Google for a day. 🙂

photo credit: Railroad Tracks Leading to 1910 Tunnel via photopin (license)

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